We're Rich, You're Dead!

LICENSED TO KILL INVITES ALTRIA CEO TO BECOME AN L2K DIRECTOR!

 

On April 29, 2004, Licensed to Kill’s Senior VP of Corporate Communications attended Altria’s Annual Meeting of Stockholders in East Hanover, NJ. The format of the meeting was almost identical to that of the Licensed to Kill Annual Meeting of Stockholders held the day before (also in East Hanover, NJ).

Core Prutspin was the last person allowed to speak during the “Question & Answer” period. While speaking, she held up the logo of our deadly company. Here is a transcription of her comments:

Good morning Mr. Camilleri (Louis). I greet you today as a fellow tobacco executive. My name is Core Prutspin and I am the Secretary and a Director of Licensed to Kill, Inc. As you know, Licensed to Kill is a real company, incorporated in the state of Virginia last year. The purpose of the company, as explicitly stated in our articles of incorporation is: to manufacture and market tobacco products in a way that each year kills over 400,000 Americans and 4.5 million other people worldwide. Our company slogan is “We’re Rich, You’re Dead!”

Yesterday, our company also held its Annual Meeting of Stockholders in East Hanover, NJ. Our company would like to expand its board of directors and is looking for people with experience in making a killing around the world. Who better than the directors of Altria? Yesterday, our stockholders voted to elect Altria’s directors to our board, pending a favorable response from them. So my question to you is, as chairman of the board of directors of Altria, will you accept our invitation to join the board of our company Licensed to Kill?

CAMILLERI’S RESPONSE: You were here last year and said the same thing. Your comments are in "poor taste."

TRUTH: Prutspin was at the Altria meeting last year, but it was Virginia Slime who represented L2K and posed a question of Camilleri, different from the one posed this year. Read more

Eight of Altria’s Directors were present at the Meeting and heard the L2K executive’s comments, but none came up afterwards to formally accept the invitation to join Licensed to Kill’s Board of Directors.

We are puzzled at their hesitancy to accept our invitation. After all, what we would like them to do for our company is nothing different than they are already doing for Altria. Then again, their company has always been adverse to telling the full truth about their deadly business. Perhaps our company’s brutal honesty has given the Altria Directors second thoughts about becoming "partners in crime"?

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